i generally think flowers and jewels are ugly and gaudy

I’ve received both from significant others in the past. I ended up feeling rather insulted because what was given was generic. (Of course, I realize now that the gifts were bids to get in my pants because they were too extravagant for so early in the relationship(s). Not that they worked in either case because I’m not the kind of person who doles out sexual favors for presents. Whatever, the guys didn’t last, obviously.) Like, gents, not all ladies want red roses and gold jewelry. Some do and that’s fantastic, but know your woman.

If someone wanted to impress/woo me, they’d give me something meaningful. Better yet, take me on an adventure, let’s go experience something together—give me a memory.